stolen

the disheartening truth is....
if boys only knew how easy it is to get me. really all i need is a nice set of eyes, a great smile, good humor, some type of uniqueness, a great deal of confidence (real or facade-ish) and i am hooked. that was a longer list than i expected. i used to think it was all about looks, but recently it has been all about the way a man carries himself. that sick confidence, the rallying of the troops and the lifting of the composers wrist. nothing more.

sometimes i wonder if guys over-analyze how to approach gals (gals-ha!). i have always valued the ability to be simplistic. set your sights high enough so that you allow yourself to dream, but still stay grounded. like wearing wings with cement shoes. (maybe i should rid myself of the shoes.) whoever the man who stills my heart (and i do mean stills, not steals; my heart is running rampant) need do is simply be confident in himself. no amount of money or job training, family situation, matters. just an overall healthy observation of who is and the ability to put the virtue of love first in his life is enough for me.

take the guy who i am currently enamored with. i have seen him several times, spoken to him once under very brief and awkward circumstances. the things that most impress me about him are his drive and searching after God, his intelligence, and his confidence. i knew there was something special about him because i would read his bleeding words and thoughts and instead of detouring me, it made me want to seek God all the more. and the way he placed his words, the things he holds important and the ideas that he supports, made me realize that he is always learning. and that i would rather be with someone who does not settle with the mere existence of things. and then there is his confidence, confidence that freely allows him to express himself in music and prose and even style. i absolutely love it when a guy has his own since of style. there are other things about him. how the pit of my stomach feels when i see him. when i can't find the words to speak to him. my whole being starts shuttering when he is near me, and most times i am not even aware of his physicality until after i experience that feeling. which makes me think, there is something more to whatever we may have. i cannot wait for everyday to come and breathe and come again. mainly because i know that everyday will hold a longer breathe of knowing him.